Judging from the title of this entry I suspect you all think that I'm about to write something dirty (don't deny it- I know how your mind works!)...I hate to disappoint you but I am actually talking about my shoes...or in better terms- my collection of shoes!
You know how some people are addicted to alcohol, chocolate, sex, smoking...well I'm addicted to shoes! 69 pairs may sound like a lot but in actual fact, it is a third of my original collection. I used to buy at least one pair of new shoes every week however these days I've cut it back to a new pair of shoes every 2-3 weeks. I honestly don't know why I love shoes so much but everytime I walk into a shoe store- it doesn't matter how bad my day has been- i instantly feel this feeling of pure, un-adulturated bliss!
I have often gotten myself into a lot of debt due to my shoe addiction. Up until recently I was a full time university student, so therefore my income wasn't that high. My inner Shoe Queen was screaming at me to buy the $2000 pair of louboutin's or jimmy choo's that i saw in the store but the realist in me bought a $200 pair instead. This may seem like a smart move-like I'm in control of my habit- but unfortunately the $200 pair of shoes was also 80% of my weekly income.
I realised my addiction was out of control when I had all of these gorgeous shoes to wear but nowhere to wear them to because I couldn't afford to go out with my friends. The $200 pair of Tony Bianco heels that I just had to have because they went with the dress I wanted to wear to my friends party were no use to me anymore because I couldn't afford to go to the party since I blew my "social" budget on shoes!
The problem was that I had the ability to justify ever purchase in my mind. "They went perfectly with my new dress" "my other shoes were falling apart" "they are too cheap not to buy" "ooh 50% off- well i wanted them when they were full price so technically i'm saving money now" "they will be an investment" "I can wear them with anything" "they are so comfy" "OMG that is the cutest pair of shoes I have ever seen in my entire life!" The excuses rolled off my tongue, the same way gossip does. My parents would often yell at me when I would ask them for a loan so I could pay my bills, when I was coming home with a new pair of shoes every week.
Over the past few months I have started to gain some control over my addiction after an intervention from some of my friends and family. I cleaned out my closet and threw over 100 pairs of shoes that I no longer needed, or wore, away. I set myself rules- I am only allowed to buy myself 2 pairs of shoes a month and my monthly budget is $200. It might seem crazy that I'm still spending that much money a month on shoes (I think that's how much my mum spends in a year) but I'm smart enough to realise that i can't just stop buying shoes altogether. I can't go cold turkey because I know that i will never be able to keep it up! However the thing that I've realised is that my addiction was controlling me and for the first time in 5 years, I'm now controlling it! I think it's okay to still allow myself the luxury of new shoes- as long as though at the end of the week or month I still have enough money to go out with my friends and pay my bills!
My wish list on many online shopping/shoe websites may contain on average a $2000 total but as long as my shopping cart maintains a balance of $0 i have something to be proud about!
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