The Happiness Manifesto

So I have to admit that over the past year,  I haven't been all that inclined to blog. It's not that I don't enjoy writing and sharing my thoughts with other people but i wasn't inspired by anything in my life. What's the point in using your voice when you don't have anything to say?

I re-read my last post on the so called 'Life Plan' that i created and I thought i should share with you what's changed in my life since. I'm now 25. The age that I feared turning because I didn't have my life together. Well sadly, I was proven right...to an extent. I still don't have a husband, a fiancé or even a boyfriend and I no longer have a job. Suddenly my life plan seems to be moving backwards, not forwards, and I have no idea how to stop it.

Two of my best friends are engaged and planning their weddings. It's hard to not be overcome by the green eyed monster when you're always the bridesmaid and never the bride. You slap on a happy face and play the supportive friend, because you are happy. In fact, you are over the moon that your best friend is getting everything that they wished for, but there's a piece of you who is selfish and bitter, and wonders why the same happiness can't happen to you. I'm conflicted with all of these emotions, and its not fair on my friends. I can't call myself a good friend if I'm only thinking of myself. And really, the situation isn't even about me. It's about them...two beautiful brides planning their perfect wedding day and I should be privileged that I'm allowed to be a part of that. The thing about jealousy is that it's a complex emotion. I'm not even sure if it is jealousy that I'm feeling, perhaps the better word to use is envy. I envy what they have. I want that for myself, and it's hard to watch two of your best friends get something that you want before you.

When my love life was going nowhere, I always had a job to focus on. I worked 5 days a week for long hours, so I didn't really have time to think. I think that is the issue now...that I have too much time on my hands. Overthinking is dangerous territory. After being hurt, emotionally, by the way i was treated at my last job, I made the decision to take a few months off work and re-evaluate my life. I'm slowly learning to rid myself of the negative energy surrounding me and focus on what makes me happy. I have been fortunate that in the past 3 months, I have been able to travel and experience some pretty wonderful things. I've seen the wonders of New York City from the top of the empire state building. I have experienced the nightlife of Paris from the Moulin Rouge and I have shopped till I dropped in London. I've been to the Gold Coast in Australia and had lunch by the beach, and in a few days time I will be heading to Los Angeles, San Francisco and Vegas to see one of my best friends who is living overseas. I've attended the Rolling Stone Awards, I've had lunch dates with friends, I've seen eight musicals on three different continents. It's been the best few months of life. I've laughed and I've cried, but through it all it may be appreciate life so much more.

Over the past week, I have attended a funeral, and heard about the shocking passing of 3 people around my own age, through mutual friends. It made me realise that life is fragile. We are only given a certain amount of time in life, to make our dreams come true. We all spend too much time contemplating the what ifs of the future instead of living for the right now. So what if I'm not in a relationship. So what if I don't have a job. So what if I have to be a bridesmaid 27 times like Katherine Heigl before it's my turn to be a bride. Right now, I have been able to see the world. Right now, I am doing something that makes me happy and right now, I am surrounded by love...love from friends and from family and love for myself.

It's not a fairytale, or a hollywood movie. It's real life and real life isn't perfect. It doesn't always go our way. But we are living, and for right now, we have today, and hopefully tomorrow, and many years after that. Do what makes you happy or find something that will make you happy. People often say that all you need is love, and i mostly agree, but I think the most important thing you need is happiness. Only once you are happy with yourself are you really able to be happy with someone else.


“Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it. You must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it.” 
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

The Life Plan

So it's been about 18 months since my last blog post. I tried to think of a good reason why I’ve neglected this blog for so long- I went on a trip around the world and didn’t have internet access, a cousin of my second cousin twice removed got sick, my dog ate my homework…but the only real reason I can find is that I lost my voice…not literally…but shock horror, I ran out of things to say (and believe me that doesn’t happen very often.)

I’ve recently been contemplating the reality that I’m turning 25 this year. It’s not the number I’m scared of, call it a quarter life crisis, but I don’t fear the age, I fear the expectations that come with being 25. Over the past year I have watched some of my closest friends get engaged, get married, buy a house, move out of home, travel the world, get their dream job and start a family…and it terrifies me to think that I’m 24 years old and still don’t have my life figured out.

But then I thought, does anyone really have their life figured out? or are we all struggling to find ourselves while projecting an image of togetherness to the world? We determine success by whether someone is in a relationship, their social status, their job, their income, their assets but we over look the single determining factor of success…happiness.

Now, I don’t have a husband, or a fiancé, or a boyfriend, or even a potential date for this weekend (not by lack of trying). I still live at home with my parents (I’m really selling myself here…guess I can rule marketing off my list of prospective careers), I don’t own a house,  or even a car and the most valuable item I own is a handbag…but I’m happy. I have amazing friends, a loving and supportive albeit slightly overbearing family. I’ve got the career I’ve always wanted- and maybe its not my dream career- but it’s the more attainable, realistic option. I’ve got a roof over my head and a pretty sizeable income. I’ve travelled overseas and I’ve met my celebrity idol three times now (if you include the time I “bumped” into him at the airport- it was purely "coincidental" that I happened to be at the right airport, at the right gate, at the right time, on the right day). While I'm comfortable with how my life is at the moment, the fear of turning 25 is that everyone expects me to have answers that I haven't quite figured out yet. I'm content being single, but yes I do want to be married and have kids some day, but no grandma, I haven't got my eye on any boy at the moment. 

A friend recently asked me if I have a 5 year plan. Before I could even respond to that question, she began to rattle off hers. It was pretty standard- establish a career, get married, start a family, travel overseas. In fact, it seemed eerily familiar as I listened to it. I guess that's why she's my best friend. We are both on the same path as each other and we're both reaching for the same things. It's good to have goals...they give us motivation to work towards achieving something...but what happens when we don't reach them? or at least not in the timeframe that we set ourselves?

Upon contemplating my own 5 year plan, I realised that cupid doesn't give a flying arrow about a 5 year plan. I can map out my life as much as I want to but at the end of the day, love will come into my life when I'm ready for it. I could meet Mr Right tomorrow but I may be 40 years old before it happens. In 5 years time I hope that I've fully established my career and right now, i'm on the right track to achieving that goal, but my boss doesn't really care about my 5 year plan. She's focused on the work I'm doing right now. So if I achieve all the things I've set out to do in the next 10 years instead of 5, have I failed because I didn't do it in my targeted timeframe or have I succeeded because I still achieved my goals?

We put far too much pressure on ourselves to do everything within an intended timeframe. The timeframe isn't something we set for ourself after careful contemplation of how long we realistically think it will take for that particular event to happen. It's usually a result of the time frame society has deemed acceptable. I think we need to focus more on a 'life plan'. Write down what we want to achieve in our lifetime and work towards those goals at our own pace. It's still essentially the same concept as a 5 year plan, or a 10 year plan but without the added stress of a deadline and the feeling of disappointment when we don't achieve something in a given time.

I'm still 8 months away from 25, so i still have quite some time to figure out who I am before I have to have all of the answers. But right now, I'm living in the present. I'm happy and I'm enjoying life as it unfolds. Whatever happens will happen when it's the right time for it to happen but until then, I'm going to immerse myself in all of the good things I have in my life already and enjoy a good cocktail or two with my friends while I'm doing it. 

Fashion comes in all shapes and sizes

I don’t have a reputation of being the most fashion forward person but I do have a reputation for wearing clothes that look good on me. As a “plus-size” girl and I use that term hesitantly because I’m a borderline size between “normal” and “plus size” I am appalled with the availability of fashion catering towards my body shape.

The fashion industry has a long history of catering to the tall, leggy, almost anorexic woman however in recent years I do give them credit for embracing the natural curves of a woman. As a young girl I would look at the models walking down the catwalks and posing in a magazine and I would aspire to be like them. I wanted to wear the pretty clothes and be beautiful. I developed a strong sense of fashion at an early age and I pride myself on keeping up to date with current trends. The biggest issue that I face today however, is that while I am aware of what is considered “fashion”, it is not readily available to me in my size. Apparently being over a size 14 means that I automatically lose my fashion sense.

It makes me wonder, how many times as a young girl, I looked at “larger” women and laughed at their frumpy fashion.  I automatically assumed that these women didn’t take pride in how they looked and were ugly- not because they were curvy, but because they didn’t wear pretty clothes. Upon growing up and becoming one of these curvier ladies I realised that the problem wasn’t that I didn’t care about fashion but rather fashion didn’t care about me.

Now I’m the first to admit that certain designs and styles of clothing aren’t going to look good me regardless of whether its available in extended sizes however just because I have more curves doesn’t mean that I want to wear a potato sack as a dress or wear an oversized t-shirt with elasticised  jeans. I want to wear the cute strapless cocktail dress, or the skinny/straight leg jeans with a cute blouse. I want to dress for my body shape but I also want my clothes to be a reflection of who I am and what I like, which is fashion!

Don’t get me wrong, not all  “plus-size” fashion is frumpy- if you step away from the Big W/Walmarts, Target’s and K-Marts of the world, you will actually find some really cute clothes. In Australia possibly the most fashion forward plus size clothing store is City Chic. When this store opened in Sydney I was beside myself with joy. Finally someone had heard my pleas and developed a fashion line that catered to my size. The joy that I felt however was only a fleeting feeling as I soon discovered many flaws with the plus-size fashion industry. For starters, plus size fashion is expensive. Now I realise that fashion in general is expensive, however I’m willing to pay good money for my designer labels but lets be realistic here- City Chic is a long way from being classified as “designer”. On average a dress in the store would cost you anywhere between $100-$180 and tops average anywhere from $50-90. Its affordable when your not buying copious amounts of clothing however when you’re a teenager or a young adult on shoestring budget, the clothes are quite expensive.

As someone on the “borderline” between normal and plus-size clothing I will also admit that I buy clothes from other Australian stores that cater for a size 6-16 such as Sportsgirl, Portmans, Bardot and Forever New. In these stores the prices of clothing are on par with the prices in City Chic- so I’m not criticizing City Chic for over-charging their customers. What I am frustrated with however is that “plus-size” girls only have City Chic as an option in regards to fashionable clothing for young adults. They have no choice but to pay the prices in this store because they can’t get clothes as stylish in another store in their size. Women who are a size 8-14 however have the option of shopping at expensive stores however they can also walk into stores like Temt, SES, Valley Girl and Ice and pick up a cocktail dress for $20 and a business suit for $40!  These clothes are replicas of the designer trends but come without the expensive label attached. One day I bought a dress in City Chic for $130 and I found a dress in the same material but slightly different style in Valley Girl for $30! That’s a $100 difference!

My sister, who’s a size 6, said to me one day whilst I was inflicting one of my rants upon her, that I should pay more for my clothes because I’m using twice as much material as her. To be fair, she has a point. I believe that a mark-up on plus size clothing is justifiable. Even double the price is fair, but in what universe is it fair for me, or some other curvier girl, to pay an extra $100 for a few more inches of material? One of the things that really bothers me with plus-size fashion in Australia is that it’s a lot more limited and expensive than in places such as the USA or the UK. I lived in the USA back in 2004 and I LOVED buying clothes over there because they were so cheap.  I often go online looking at stores such as Forever 21 with their extended sizes or Torrid and I find all of these cheap gorgeous clothes in my size. The only reason I hesitate about buying them is that they usually incur a $40-50 shipping fee. Now, even with the shipping costs, due to a strong exchange rate, the clothes still work out cheaper than buying them here in Australia however if for some reason I select the wrong size, and lets face it- size charts aren’t always reliable- then I have to spend another $50 shipping it back, which means I ultimately paid $100 for nothing. Also packages are delivered within 1-3 weeks, which is okay if you can wait, but not good if your looking to buy an outfit for an unexpected party on the weekend!

The other issue that I find really frustrating when it comes to buying clothes, and I’m sure many girls of all sizes will agree with me, is the automatic assumption that when you go up a size in clothing, you automatically become taller and increase your cup size.  I find that a lot of plus size clothing is often to long for my height and therefore needs alterations before I even wear the outfit. To put what I’m saying into perspective, I am 5 foot 6 inches tall. Average height- not what I would call tall but I can’t be considered short either.  Upon measuring myself against the size chart on the City Chic website I was amused to find that I had the bust size of an  XS (size 14), waist measurement of a S-M (size  16-18) and hip measurement of an XS.-S (size 14-16). From this I gathered that I should average a size 16 or a SMALL in that store. You can imagine my shock when I had to buy an XL in a top in order for it to fit me. I find it hard enough to buy clothes that cater to my abnormal measurements and I have enough self-esteem issues, than to be told that I am an XL in plus-size clothing. Now I know that I am not the only person to experience this problem. My sister who I mentioned is a size 6, is a fitness instructor who lives on a freakishly healthy diet. She is borderline OCD about being skinny and makes sure to avoid fats and sugars and exercise everyday. If she happens to gain 1kg she will double the amount of time she spends exercising in order to lose it straight away. She has gone up two sizes before for no apparent reason and it really screwed with her self-esteem and her confidence in her body.  Both of us are coming from two different angles and yet we are both experiencing the same problems. However at least when she goes up a few sizes because of the make of the dress she can still wear designer fashion-when I go up a few sizes the fashion industry tells me that they don’t make clothes in that size.

I will say that the availability of fashion in my size is improving- I’m sure my overflowing closet and dresser are testament to that fact, but we still have a long way to go before I’m satisfied.  I’m fortunate enough that being on the cusp of sizes between standard and plus-size that I do get to experience a bit of both worlds and I’m not strictly limited to one like some people, however perhaps this has made it even more frustrating for me, because I am neither one nor the other so I can’t just accept it. There are elements of the fashion world that I get to experience that make me crave for the parts that I can’t have and there are element of plus-size fashion that I get to experience that really allow me to identify the distance between the two fashion worlds.

In conclusion I just want to point out that fashion is what you make it. Clothes that look good on you will always be more fashionable than clothes that you think you’re supposed to wear because some magazine said so. While the fashion industry may discriminate based on size, fashion sense and awareness of what looks good doesn’t. I just hope the fashion industry recognize more openly that there is a huge market that they could cater to in the plus-size world which is filled with fashion savvy girls with their credit cards ready just waiting to buy that gorgeous dress they saw on the catwalk at fashion week.

For all those curvy girls out there who think that the fashion industry is overlooking them, I leave you with the wise words of Coco Chanel :

 “Fashion is not something that exists in dresses only. Fashion is in the sky, in the street, fashion has to do with ideas, the way we live, what is happening.” 

XOXO

What is Luck?

What is Luck?

Not in the sense of the literal definition, but what does luck mean to you? Is it winning a million dollars? coming first in a race? getting a promotion? becoming a celebrity? or simply avoiding a horrible tragedy?

I have often equated luck to material objects. In my view I was lucky if I got to go on a holiday or if I won a competition. I was extremely lucky if I won the lottery (although the odds aren't in my favour on that one!) or if I was able to meet my favourite celebrity (it's true- having the chance to meet Adam Lambert made me feel like the luckiest girl alive) however lately I have begun to wonder if my perception of luck is all wrong.

True story (from my highly (in)accurate source-My dad): There was this guy who visited a psychic who told him that he would experience great luck in his near future. A few days later the guy got offered the opportunity to speak at a medical conference in Mexico. He felt like it was a huge honour and it was the LUCKIEST thing that had ever happened to him. He'd been waiting all of his life for this opportunity. However, on the day he was supposed to leave, bad weather prevented his flight from flying out and it got cancelled. The next available flight he could get on, would deliver him at his final destination a few hours too late. The guy was devastated. He went home from the airport and rang the psychic back. He was angry because he had been UNLUCKY which wasn't what the psychic had predicted for him. The next day he turned on the news to find out that the hotel in Mexico, where the conference was being held and he would've been had the flight left on time, had collapsed and most people had inside the building had died or were severely injured.

The point to the story: the guy's LUCK was that he avoided death. The LUCK he thought he'd received wasn't talking at this conference but instead he was LUCKY that not going to the conference saved his life.

This story was what made me change my perception of luck. Sometimes we forget to look at the big picture...instead of being thankful that we are lucky to have our health, our family, our friends, our partners, a steady income, a roof over our heads etc, we focus on all of things we don't have or we want- to win the lottery, a new car, winning a holiday, a bigger pay cheque.

They say that if you find the end of the rainbow, you'll find a pot of gold. Well I've found the end of my rainbow and what I've found is that I'm lucky for the life I have now. It may not be perfect but I've got my health, I've got the love of my friends and family and I've got financial security- and that makes me the luckiest girl on the planet.

So next time your sitting at a traffic light that's taking forever to change, or your flight gets cancelled- instead of getting upset- remember that things happen for a reason and by being exactly where you are in that moment it may make you the luckiest person in the world to be alive!

It's the end of the world as we know it...

So I've always been fascinated by psychic predictions and things like astrology and numerology. I like to believe that we have the power to predict certain things and that there are signs that lead us to a particular outcome.

The Mayans predict that in 2012 the world will end. Now I've seen the movie 2012 (mainly because Adam Lambert sang the title track of the film) and I've also seen movies like The Day After Tomorrow. Each of these "end of the world by natural disaster" movies have left me with questions and a lingering fear that this could be my future and my fate. However I have recently come across some new information that has made me rethink my belief towards how the world will end.

A few weeks ago my parents went on cruise. As they were sailing the seas, they attended a talk on their cruise by a special guest John Arthur Daley, who is well known in Australia for his work on radio and his understanding of numerology. Now according to my dad, who may or may not be a reliable source, John said that the Mayans are known to accurately predict events and that there is validity to their 2012 predictions. However, unlike in the movie 2012, John says that the world wont "end", instead it will be the end of the world as we know it.

Now what does this mean exactly. Well according to what he told my dad, he said that the world's political and economical stability is going to completely unravel. There are going to be changes in power, countries are going to experience major uprisings and the way we live now, in this world, will dramatically change- due to manmade and natural disasters. He said that we can see the warning signs now- the protests in Egypt, the earthquakes in Christchurch and Tokyo, the floods in Queensland, Climate change...All of these events are affecting the lives of the people in those countries and the economy of those countries. John said that over the next year, we will see an increase in these events, and that the magnitude of these events will be even greater than we have ever experienced in this lifetime.

Now, a part of me is a little sceptical, mainly because I don't want to believe that 2012 signifies the end of something, however you can't help but realise that what he says makes sense. It's crazy to imagine the world just ending however it's not out of the realm of possibility that an event will occur that will change our lives forever. It's a scary concept to someone who believes in the power of numerology.

But don't be alarmed- like I said, this information isn't proven or 100% accurate- it's only speculation at this point- but I do believe that we should prepare ourselves for the likelihood of something happening that will change the way we are living now. It's one thing to be sceptical, it's another thing to be ignorant. Don't ignore the signs.

She works hard for her money....

Hey everyone, sorry I've been MIA from this blog for over a week now! I had it all planned out that I would post a new blog entry that was funny and entertaining but unfortunately the issue that I've decided to blog about today is a controversial one that has been upsetting me for the past 4-5 years.

I graduated high school in 2006 and started full-time study at university in 2007. During that time I worked on average 10 hours a week in part time employment as well as taking on board "jobs" such as baby-sitting and research marketing in order to help offset the costs of being a full time student. Now during the time I attended university I lived at home with my parents and I relied on them to pay for my living expenses even at the age of 21 (my final year of study). I wasn't able to receive any government assistance such as youth allowance to help me during those four years because according to centrelink, my parents earned too much money. Fair enough, as a tax payer myself now, I understand that it was my decision to be a full-time student and I knew the costs associated with attending university before I even applied but what really used to fire me up was the unfairness of the youth allowance scheme.

Take for example my friend, she received $250 from centrelink every week because her parents didn't earn an above average income. I don't begrudge her the financial assistance in that regard but the $200 allowed her to move out of home and rent her own apartment and she only had to work 5 hours a week, just so she had some money on the side to go out with friends.

Example two is my other friend, who decided to take some time off from studying to work fulltime before heading back to university the following year. Because she earned a fair amount of money in that year, she was eligible for youth allowance upon returning to her studies. What irritates me in this situation, is not that she receives government payments, it's that she doesn't work at all because she doesn't need to since the government is paying her a steady income every week.

Now when I say I'm not eligible for centrelink because my parents earn too much money, I have to clarify my parents financial situation. My parents both work full time, in good jobs that give them each an income of around $60K a year. My sister and I have never gone with out, and have been spoilt our whole lives however at the end of the day my parents aren't earning a massively high income when you take into account the cost of living, a mortgage, the expenses of running two family cars and utility bills. They make enough to be comfortable but they work hard for every cent. So here I was at 21 years old, still studying and only working part time, and I was expecting my parents to spend hundreds of dollars every semester on textbooks, provide me with all of my living expenses and  also give me a travel allowance of $30 a week to get to and from uni.

My parents supported my decision to go to university and were willing to cover these expenses however at what point are parents able to stop "paying" for their children. My issue with the clause on centrelink payments is that, at 21 I was an adult, legal in every country in the world and I made a decision to attend university for 4 years in the hope that I could graduate with a degree that would allow me to get a good job/career. At 21 I shouldn't have to be dependent on my parents for everything. At 21, my parent's income shouldn't be a factor as to whether I get government financial assistance. At 21, my parents shouldn't be forced to give me 'X' amount of money every week or month. It's their hard earned money and I'm not a 'child' that they legally need to support anymore.

I think the real problem that I have with centrelink is that it's sending young people the wrong message. Its discouraging us from transitioning straight from high school to university, because if we take a year off to work than we can get money every week off the government when we go back to studying. It's punishing youths who come from families who earn decent, but not ridiculously high income. My friend in example one was able to move into a place with her friends and be independent because he parents earned a low income, while I was forced to live at home because my parents didn't earn enough to pay for rent on a second place.

Here's the reality of the situation: I studied for 4 years while working permanent part time, graduated, and now I'm working as a teacher, paying my taxes to the Australian government and contributing to society. I have never received a cent off the government and probably never will. Meanwhile my friend, in example two, worked full time for 9 months straight after high school and has now been studying at university for 6 years, receiving centrelink payments every week for 6 years and hasn't worked a day in the past 4 years because she doesn't have to. Where is the fairness in that?


Please note: I fully support government payments to those people who truly need the assistance, however I am frustrated at the loopholes that are in our current system that allow people to take advantage of the system and use it as an excuse not to work. I'm genuinely sorry if I offend anyone.

The Saving Grace of Idol...

So i've been watching American Idol lately. After the tragedy that was Season 9 I was wary about how Idol could redeem itself. The addition of Steven Tyler and Jennifer Lopez was a great idea- i love Steven's unfiltered comments and I find myself drooling over J-Lo's outfits- however I can't help but miss the snarky, tell it how it is, no bullshit nature of Simon Cowell. I'm not a big fan of Randy Jackson. If I had a dollar for every time he calls someone DAWG I could happily retire a millionaire at the grand old age of 22!  But the judges aside- the contestants this season actually showed some promise.

I have to admit that Adam Lambert kind of ruined idol for me. Never has a contestant amazed me and awed me as much as he did from the moment he walked into the audition room. Adam didn't just break the idol mould, he completely shattered it into tiny specks of glitter. However just because I'll never love someone as much as I do Adam, it doesn't mean that I'm not open to new talent. I approached season 10 with an open mind and a willingness to embrace the new contestants. I just prayed that there would be someone who grabbed my attention the way Adam did from day one.

My prayers were answered in the form of Colton Dixon, a 19 year old singer songwriter. He looked and sounded like a cross between Kris Allen and Cassidy Haley, but what grabbed my attention was his charisma on stage. Not only was he good looking- he had the talent to back it up. Finally American Idol was looking up again. I had a reason to watch the show. My world came crashing down however just as the judges were announcing the top 24. Colton didn't make it. I was stunned and apparently so were many people. Ellen even asked him to perform on her show because she couldn't believe the judges decision. What intrigued me about this turn of events is that the public seemed to be devastated by this news. This cut happened a week before, we the home viewers, got a chance to vote for who stays and who leaves. It made me question how much control we really have over the outcome of show. 

But like the real world, sometimes idol doesn't always work out the way you want it too and so I readjusted my view of the show and tried to transfer my support for Colton across to a few other contestants I liked. Upon hearing the results for the top 12 (or should I say 13), I was pleased with the outcome for the boys. I loved Casey, Paul and Jacob. James deserved to be there too, but he's still growing on me. I don't like the Adam Lambert 2.0 comparisons that he's getting but I respected him a little more after last week when he stopped trying to be Adam (like seriously- Adam owned A Change is Gonna Come on idol- why would you touch it?) and infused more of "James" the metal rock singer into his performance. I liked the originality of it! Scotty on the other hand is a contestant I'm still trying to get used too. I do think he deserves to be there, but as I'm not a huge country fan, I don't get the obsession everyone has with him...yet! There is still hope that he may win me over. I also didn't mind the addition of Stefano in the wildcard round. At least there is some eye-candy this season.

The result for the top 6 (or should I say 7) girls was a little disappointing though. I was ecstatic that Lauren and Pia got through...I've loved them both from the beginning, but I question the publics decision of choosing Karen over Kendra. I'm sorry Karen but you are no Mariah Carey- singing songs in another language will win you no points with me. There is something about Karen that to me screams Miss America contestant. It's a little fake and contrived. Kendra on the other hand was amazing. I loved the uniqueness in her voice and I only hope that America realises the mistake they made by sending her home and keeping Karen and Hailey instead. Thia is not my favourite contestant. I'm a little conflicted towards her because I think she has an amazing voice but her performances never excite me. Maybe as she grows more comfortable with the camera she'll improve her stage presence. Now the judges wildcard is something that i don't entirely agree with. I like the addition of Naima. She didn't wow me during the top 24 round but I loved her during the auditions because she was unique and original. But Ashthon (or however you spell her name) I don't think is as good as what the judges think she is. However what do I know? If it were up to me I would've crowned Colton Dixon the winner of American Idol 2011 the first week! 

So American Idol left me reeling in shock after the elimination of Kendra this week. I almost lost faith in the show once again. But luckily for Idol, the news that Adam Lambert would be performing his acoustic version of Aftermath on the show next week, gave me reason to keep tuning in. Once again, Adam Lambert is the saving grace of Idol. I can't wait for Adam to go on and show these contestants and these judges what it means to be a true musician and a true performer. 

Like Adam himself said, people need to stop with the comparisons. No one will ever be as good as Adam but it doesn't mean that they still can't blow us away. There is never going to be another Kradam- you can't re-enact a friendship between two contestants- instead lets focus on what is in front of us. A new group of 13 talented, unique performers who need to stand on their own two feet as original artists instead of living in the shadows of former idol contestants. We're not here to find a new Adam Lambert or a new Kelly Clarkson. We're here to find someone else, who's different, who's original and who will have the ability to take the world by storm, the same way contestants like Adam and Kelly have.